Written by Matthew Pardue
Well, it turns out that my summer reading list isn’t coming along that well. Or coming along at all, really. Not because I can’t find the books—one’s been sitting by my bed for the past week and a half—but because I’m lazy and working on other things. This throws an obvious wrench into my original plan to do weekly reviews about my reading. Or does it?
Yes, it does, but what I’m getting at is that I’ve got an alternative. You see, it occurred to me the other day (while trying to justify my lack of progress, but that’s neither here nor there) that I do read on a daily basis, and not just for work. The material just isn’t in print form. For years now, I’ve been a fan of several webcomics, which change depending on my preferences and the work ethic of the writers and artists (I’m probably the worst person to judge someone for slacking off, so I try to be forgiving when a favorite webcomic dies). One quick conversation with my boss after I had this realization, and now I have material to write about for at least the next two months.
Webcomics, for those of you who don’t know, are comics posted online. That isn’t a difficult definition; it’s right there in the name. A better description, I think, is to tell you what they aren’t. For the most part, webcomics aren’t the traditional superhero stories with colorful (to use the term in a variety of senses) characters flying around and beating the pixels out of one another. And a good thing, too, because that kind of graphic novel doesn’t appeal to me. My second largest problem is that they’re bad about overstaying their welcome. Here’s an example: Superman, the best-known and most widespread superhero of all time, first appeared in 1938. Since then, as far as I can tell from my quick research, he’s gone through at least two relaunches (a term, I believe, that comes into play at meetings when all the developers have run out of new ideas and collectively throw up their hands in defeat, then say, “Wait, what if we start over and do it again with slightly different variations?”) and as many as twenty-six different writers. That’s bleach-drinking insanity. What can you do with a character that sticks around for seventy-four years? At some point, every series needs to end, preferably with grace, dignity, and a fitting conclusion that leaves the fans with fond memories. Superhero comics often disagree.
The bigger issue for me is pettier, but I just can’t get past it: I can’t take the outfits seriously. I understand the whole deal with keeping a secret identity (Superman’s tactic of I’m wearing glasses now, so you can’t recognize me is as hilarious as it is bold, so I’ll give him some credit there, at least). But why not pick a uniform that’s grounded in reality? Rorschach from Watchmen did that and came off as a complete bad-ass. Meanwhile, if I saw Superman passing overhead, my first comment wouldn’t be, “Good Lord, is that guy flying?” but rather, “Good Lord, who shot that figure skater out of a cannon?”
I’m getting even more off-topic than usual. Back to the matter at hand: webcomics. Rather than just being about an at-best loose application of science and the liberal use of spandex, they reflect the full range of graphic novels as a whole, with topics ranging from stick-figure math jokes (XKCD) to a Victorian-era alternate universe based on mad science (Girl Genius). And on that note, let’s have a look at the latter (we’ll get to XKCD at some point in the coming weeks).
Girl Genius is possibly my favorite webcomic. It has a lot going for it: the art is great (more on that in a minute), the setting is better (much more on that), and the humor is best (quite a lot on that throughout this review). It also never misses an update. I think part of the development team was in the hospital at one point, and the only change was that the latest page went up in black and white. Given that internet fans tend to be about as patient as starving wolverines, I can see the wisdom in keeping a tight schedule.
The basic idea is this: the creators, Phil and Kaja Foglio, give us the story of Agatha, originally a tormented intern/lab assistant with lots of mad science ideas that just won’t come out right for some reason. Just a few pages into the plot, the two unluckiest bastards in the world decide to steal her locket, given to her by her now-vanished uncle who goes deliberately unnamed for a good chunk of the story. Once she’s lost her jewelry, those faded engineering ideas become a lot clearer, and things get fun.
Move forward eleven volumes (the story is currently on what’ll be the twelfth), and Agatha’s now a genius Spark (I’ll get to that) with the genius Spark heirs to two different empires behind her, in the middle of a free-for-all battle over the fate of Europe. The contenders include the current rulers (the Wulfenbach empire, led by possibly my favorite character, Klaus Wulfenbach), the rulers before them (a whole menagerie of noble families vaguely working together and not-so-vaguely stabbing one another in the back out of habit), the Other and its slaver wasps (artificial hives in which some bugs dig into your brain and work you like a hand puppet and other, bigger bugs just stab you full of holes), and the formerly-extinct Heterodynes (Europe’s resident family of Genghis Kahns, leading an army of other Genghis Kahns in a little Transylvanian country of more Genghis Kahns, grave robbers, and coffee brewers [their job is more interesting than it sounds]). Readers of the comic will see that I simplified some points to avoid spoilers; Wikipedia isn’t so kind, so I suggest you avoid it unless you want to ruin a few of the surprises just by seeing the last names of key characters.
That tells you a little about Girl Genius, but it doesn’t tell you what makes it great. Let’s try an illustration:
You’re looking at Agatha (the main character, as mentioned before), Othar the self-titled Gentleman Adventurer hanging in the second panel (his label and reputation are misleading; as far as the protagonists are concerned, he causes more harm than good), and, my favorite, two Jägermonsters, or Jagers to the fans. Nearly every character has some great humor at some point, but the Jagers are by far the most fun to watch. Calling back a paragraph or so, the Jagers worked for the Heterodynes until the disappearance of the line. They’re ageless superhumans who see pain and dismemberment as just parts of the job, and see the job as an eternity of raiding and warfare. For largely remorseless murderers, most of them are quite cheerful and easygoing.
This seems like a good time to point out that while the comic has violence, it’s cartoony. People get stabbed, beaten, and sometimes lose limbs, but the most you’ll see is strawberry jam-styled blood. Nothing has struck me as gruesome. The language is also mild. There’s no nudity, although short nightgowns pop up now and then, along with other semi-revealing clothing. I’ve read that Kaja and Phil Foglio want to keep their work on a level that their kids can enjoy, as opposed to some of their past, ah, less child-friendly comics (which I won’t link to because I like my job).
Anyway, the Jagers (I’m still bitter that I didn’t come up with them first). They’re one of many science projects by the Sparks, mad scientists who create impossible things that, ideally, only blow up when they’re supposed to. Some Sparks work with machinery; some work with living things (as with the Jagers). Each has their own recognizable style. Klaus Wulfenbach, for example, who I mentioned earlier, seems to specialize in huge equipment:
That’s him in the mech-suit, with the stitches (he gets hurt a lot, and I’m pretty sure he’s died a few times; death in this setting is more of a setback, as you can see in the second page). The old man about to beat Klaus back into a coma is Dr. Sun, another Spark. We also have Sun’s granddaughter and Vole, an ex-Jager (among other problems, he didn’t fit in because he has no sense of humor). The severed head is someone whose bad day is only getting worse from here on out.
That sums up the basics of the comic: a very funny, well-written, well-drawn story that updates three times a week and has lots and lots of material for you to pick away at. I greatly recommend it. The first page is here: http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20021104. If you take my advice and read it, leave a comment either here or on our Facebook page and let me know what you think.